10/100 Days of Productivity


I want to talk to you about something.  ...obviously..

I was writing a paper for my for Aging & Society nursing class and it got me thinking about me and my possible future.  This section of the class is covering how being a woman, being impoverished or being a minority affects the elderly population specifically.  And I kinda thought to myself..."Will that be me?" "Will I be a poor, struggling, black woman when 2066 rolls around?"

The thing is...

I have "unpopular" plans for my life.  I don't plan to marry or have children...at least not from my own uterus.  The way I see it, I'm already almost 25 CRAAAAAAPPP!!! and I'm just now really starting my college career.  I'll be here for another 3 years, which means I'll practically be 30 when I'm out of this academic prison.  If the stars align and I have some magical sort of Disney princess-esque encounter then maybe I'll be Mrs. New Last Name, but I can't tell you how unlikely that is. I simply don't have the tolerance required for sharing my life with others.  Also, when I get out of school and start making cashh monayyyy, I want to have the utmost level of freedom and flexibility.  I'm not interested in having close contact with differing opinions or anyone who could possibly keep me from doing what I want.  TL;DR: I'm tryna TURN UP!! Anywho, I've also been told my whole life that if I want to have money, I shouldn't have kids. lol (Thanks a lot, mom.) I know she's being humorous, but she might actually be onto something.  I think that sometime in my adolescence there was supposed to be a time when I had baby fever or had a rush of motherly feelings....but it seems as if that ship sailed without me.  I can appreciate children and the joy that they have the potential to bring, but I don't feel as if they're an essential part of my personal life.  Not sure. Right now I feel as if I could tilt either way. But when people ask where I see myself in 5 or 10 years, there aren't any children in the thought bubble.

With that said, I would imagine that my future might look a little brighter financially? Now, don't get it twisted. I don't know the first thing about adulting.  However, some concepts do seem rather clear.  If I, as a nurse, make a certain amount of money as my coworker who has a family to tend to and additional bills and family projects (I'm talking about childrens' school trips to fund, unexpected family medical bills, etc.) to fund, I would expect that my paycheck would be a bit less tied up than hers, no? When I think about the expenses that can and will come with keeping a family, it honestly stresses me out.  It's easy to plan for a hypothetical life where you have a successful husband that loves you and your children are healthy and well-behaved and you never total your car or have the roof blown off of your home by a tornado.  But when he leaves, they don't give you a discount on the mortgage.  And when your children are reckless you don't get BOGO X-rays.  The Brady Bunch life is on tv for a reason.  The drama is limited to sibling rivalries and who did what at the church picnic.  But in the real world, everything is much more unpredictable and volatile.

I have a 401(k).  I don't say that to brag.  I say that because it's a thing and although there isn't much in there, there's a significant amount more there than the $0 it started with.  As the years go by, I want to be able to continue to contribute to this retirement fund, as well as others.  I want to have the "extra" money to put aside for when my body won't let me work anymore.  I don't want to get older and older, year after year and worry if I'm going to outlive my funds.  That's a frightening thought.  Who would think that your longevity would be a problem? Unfortunately, it is for many.  My Aging & Society has made this more than clear to me.  The lifestyles that people had in place at a young age greatly impacted them and their finances until the end of their lives.  I want to pay off my student loans and credit cards and such.  I don't want to owe anyone anything.  I want to be a free woman.  I don't want to struggle.  The life expectancy is higher, but that doesn't mean we're healthy.  I don't want to wonder if I can afford my life sustaining medication every month.  I don't want to feel harassed when the bills come in the mail and I have to pull out my....digital checkbook? Who knows.  What I do know is that I want to live my life to the fullest -- my version of the fullest -- and somehow make it out okay.

It's never too early to think about these things.
Thoughts? Do share.
xoxo, Bee


  1. This post stressed me a little... I started thinking "aww man! what if little atticus climbs up the bookshelf and it falls on him! ugh insurance! ugh time off!" gah!!!!!!

    1. It's a real thing! Of course, parenthood isn't all tragedy but still...things do happen. As I always say, "Different stroke for different folks." I think my stroke is childless with a fleet of dogs. lol


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